Month: July 2015

A Priceless Treasure

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

Over the years after moving from place to place I’ve cultivated many friendships but there are very few of them that have remained to stay in my life and they have become my best friends. One of them is away at college most of the time so we don’t get to see each other much or spend time together but we keep in touch and the other well we act like we never get to see each other but him and I are like two peas in a pod and so much more alike than people would suspect. But anyway, when I think about the story of how our friendship started I can’t really tell you one because it kind of just one day began and then instantaneously grew into something quite interesting to be honest. He has stuck by my side in this little adventurous life of mine through all the ups and downs and I honestly have no idea what I would do without him because I would be lost. He is truly my best friend and the one who keeps me sane even though sometimes he drives me insane. When my mother first got diagnosed it seemed as if my life was over and nothing was worth the effort anymore. As I went to school the next day although I did my best to cover my puffy eyes and face up, he saw right through me and knew something was wrong. I could barely get the words out to tell him that she had cancer without getting choked up and crying but he was the only person I trusted and knew that I could confide in. He hugged me so tight that day I think he popped a rib back into place which inevitably wasn’t a bad thing and I have become so grateful for the relationship we have. We have laughed together and cried together but above all and most importantly we have been there for each other through thick and thin and it means the world to me. Well anyway enough about that weirdo, when anything bad or tough occurs in your life you very quickly find out who your true friends are. They are the ones that are there for you no matter what you’re going through and only have your best interest at heart because they truly care about you. These are the kind of people that you should not only have but want in your life. They are the ones you need to keep around because they are going to stick around for the long haul. So take the time to make those kind of  friendships and to invest in your friends lives because in the end they become a priceless treasure. I hope that you not only like this post but also comment about a friend in your life that has become a priceless treasure because I would love to read your stories. So until next time….

Sincerely, 

The Caregiver ❤️ 

A Moment For A Tear

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

My heart breaks each and every day that passes by. The pain in my heart grows but I never show it for fear to bring everyone else down when it is vital to keep spirits high. But every now and then I find time usually right before I go to sleep to create a single moment to shed a tear just for a minute. I hate cancer and all that comes with it. This is an agonizing journey and we are not even half way through it. The days of treatment like today seem to last forever and not end. You sit in wait as they pump these toxic chemicals into your body with intentions  to kill the cancer but in reality they seem to be slowly killing you. I have come to know and meet so many people who are either going through cancer, have cancer, or know some one with cancer and they all have stories to tell. Some are happy and very encouraging and others to be honest scare the crap out of me. The stories that I fear the most of coming true are the ones of beating cancer but the chemo beating you. I mean honestly, how unfair is that? You beat cancer and become cancer free but your body has become so tired that in a way you still lose. Throughout this battle you become very aware of the value of life and it’s the little moments that count the most because those are the ones you want to hold onto and hope will last forever. I fear losing my mom because  she is all I got left. I know that on my blog I post about staying positive and you’re probably thinking that I need to listen to my own advice but when you live this, even breathing can seem like a chore. I know there are so many people out in the world that are worse off than I and its different for the people who actually go through cancer but watching the person you love the most go through this hurts you from the inside out but they above all can never know for fear of them losing what hope and fight that they have. In the end to kind of turn this around and give you something to take from this, every now and then it’s good to cry and let it all out so that you can heal and move on so that you can be strong for the people you love and I know this may not be a positive post, but it was a needed one. So thank you for letting me rant and for actually taking the time to read this through. But most of all I thank you for sharing my moment for a tear. 

Sincerely, 

The Caregiver ❤️ 

A Life of Hope 

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

It’s one thing to take care of some one with cancer and it’s something completely different to actually have and go through cancer. Everything in your life changes and you begin an emotional roller coaster. You have your good days and then you have your bad days which seem to occur more often than the good days if we are all being honest and as I sit by and watch my own mother go through this it breaks my heart to think that I can’t do anything to help her get through this. I can’t heal her body, I can’t take the cancer away, and most of all I can’t fight this for her. But I can be there for her when she needs me and help her when I can because the key to this entire journey is to look for the silver lining and keep your hopes high. If you give up your hope and positivity then all is lost and you willingly have surrendered to this fight. I mean yes of course there are going to be bad days and it may seem like there is no ray of sunshine or light at the end of the tunnel but you can’t lose hope because then what else do you have to hold on to. Cancer sucks and there’s no other way to describe it but every journey has an uphill climb no matter what route you take. You can try to avoid it, take a short cut, or even go around it but it’s not until you face the situation head on that you start to make progress even if it is just baby steps. A little progress is better than no progress and keeping your hopes high is what will get you through this no matter the situation in your life. If I have learned anything at all in these last couple of months the most important thing has to be to keep fighting no matter how much you want to quit, to keep the faith, to keep the hope, and to love beyond compare because in this life of ours we don’t know when our last day will be and to live like that will truly be our greatest adventure. 

Sincerely,

The Caregiver   ❤️ 

The Caring Heart

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

When most people meet for the first time you automatically look at there appearance and judge there character based on what they’re wearing or look like and then come to find out after you get to know them they are completely different and nothing you ever expected. As I go to each and every treatment, blood test, and doctors appointment with my mom I’m constantly surrounded by people who have cancer and I’ve learned that some of the people although they might not look like “the normal” person does, some of these people are the most kind and wonderful people and have hearts that truly just care for everyone around them whether they are sick or completely healthy. They are so kind to me because they know what it’s like to be The Caregiver of a cancer patient and are always so encouraging. Each time I go with my mom for her chemo treatments there are so many people there in that one room and when some one receives good news everyone celebrates with them and when some one doesn’t get the greatest news they all have such a beautiful compassion for each other that it just melts your heart. My mom and I ventured out to the grocery store one day when she was feeling better and had some energy and she wore her cap that had a breast cancer ribbon on it and her pink warrior shirt. So many people looked at us differently because they could tell she was sick. Some were kind and mostly sympathetic but there were some very rude people who could care less and just gave us ugly looks and made nasty comments. This one woman didn’t even want to touch whatever it was that we touched because she was afraid she would “catch cancer.” So in all honesty I went up to the woman and touched all of the items in her basket and she became angered, scoffed at me, and walked away and I on the other hand put on my winning smile and laughed all the way to the check out line wishing her a grand rest of the day…..I’m only kidding, but I so wish I did! Anyway, in all honesty, I don’t care whether you’re sick, healthy, tall, short, chubby, thin, athletic, chill, or whatever it is that describes you and who you are in the end we all bleed red. We all have a heart that beats inside our chest and its what keeps us all alive. We all should have the kind of heart that yearns to help, love, care, and to be kind to others. No one in this entire world deserves to be unloved or uncared for. I have gained a new respect for people since embarking on this new journey of mine and I can only hope that others will to after reading this. So if you’re reading this, I hope that you not only like this post but comment you’re story of when you cared for some one or when some one went out of their way and cared for you and made you feel special in your life. 

Sincerely,

The Caregiver   ❤️ 

Making the Change

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

When some one you love is diagnosed with cancer so are you. You’re whole life and everything you knew to be normal somehow changes and sometimes it changes much faster than you want it to. Everything I normally ate became organic and healthy and I gained many new responsibilities that I never thought I would have to do. When this kind of change happens there are many growing pains and even though you may not like it, you have to learn to adjust because this is going to be your new normal. I haven’t met one person in my life that likes change and honestly I am one of the worst people when it comes to changing things because I absolutely hate change.  But we all have to learn to grow up and adapt to new circumstances eventually right?! Honestly I’ve had to be an adult and make big decisions for my family since I was young and didn’t really have any other choice. I had to be very mature, carry myself to a higher standard, and had no time for a childhood because my family needed me more than what I or others wanted. So in the end, whatever it is you’re going through, you may not like it or you may in fact hate it but we all have to change eventually and it’s better to get it over with now than waiting and making it harder. 

Sincerely,

The Caregiver  ❤️ 

Learning the Pain 

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

When I was first told the news and hearing those dreaded words come out of my moms mouth that she has CANCER, time froze within those few seconds. That single moment resembled a scene in a movie where you see the bomb count down those last few seconds then everything goes silent as the bomb goes off with everyone screaming, running, and all you hear is just a high pitch screech ringing in your ears. That night as I went to bed, I just laid there and cried my eyes out beating on my pillow screaming out to God why?! Why?! Why?! Why me?! Why her?! Why now?! I mean how could this happen?! My mom is truly my hero and we had just finished getting through my parents divorce and this wasn’t fair!!! My eyes had swollen so bad that it looked like I had gotten into a fight and had a black eye. According to my friends at school the next day I did because that’s the story I told them until I was allowed to announce that my mom had cancer. My mom taught at the same school I attended so it was a pretty big deal. It was kind of hard to keep the secret with my principal announcing it in the morning announcements the following Monday giving me barely anytime to adjust to the news myself. Everyone around me thought “oh this is simple she can have it taken out and that’s it, right?” Unless you go through something like this you will never know what’s it’s like and all that you have to go through. When it comes to something like this you find out real quick who your true friends are. I’ve had people tell me to get over it and to stop being “so dramatic.” This news wrecked my world, how could they even say something like that to me? I would never wish something like this on my worst enemy. Well anyway as the weeks past one after the other leading up to our first treatment day I had more time to deal with it and I’ve become better and trusting God more and more but there are still those days that can be very very challenging to get through and on those days my main goal is to get through and just lay my head on my pillow again. So in the end learning to deal with the pain can be hard but sometimes screaming, crying, and just letting it all out is what you need. Keeping everything inside and concealing all the pain is not only unhealthy but it just builds up and keeps building until one day some one or something triggers you and you crash, burn, and fall apart. Having a friend there for you that you know you can trust can always help with letting whatever it is you’re keeping inside get out and into the open. Nothing about this journey is easy and no one ever promised it would be so finding a way to cope, pushing through each day, and to keep fighting is half of the battle already won.
Sincerely, 

The Caregiver ❤️ 

The Becoming of “The Caregiver”

Posted on by becomingthecaregiver

Becoming “The Caregiver” of anyone who has cancer is tough. But becoming a caregiver of a cancer patient when you’re a teen can be even tougher. My mom was diagnosed with an aggressive and fast moving Breast Cancer on April 15Th, which was only 15 days before my 18th birthday, 30 days before my high school graduation, and three days after that we were at the cancer center first thing that Monday morning getting ready for her first chemo treatment that day. When someone in your immediate family is diagnosed you become diagnosed as well. I had a very short time to relearn how to cook cause everything we ate now was organic, I had to pick up most of her around the house responsibilities, and become an adult really fast. I had no time to think or breathe or deal with what I was feeling inside. Becoming the caregiver is very emotional and it can become very difficult to stay strong and positive for your loved one with all those unsettled emotions. Well anyway writing this blog has given me a way to meet people and deal with it, so hopefully I can help you too. 

Sincerely, 

The Caregiver ❤️